Chapter 13
Part 13
11 min read · 2,257 words
“Fiddlesticks!” returned Jo, slamming the door.
They had a charming time, for _The Seven Castles Of The Diamond Lake_
was as brilliant and wonderful as heart could wish. But in spite of the
comical red imps, sparkling elves, and the gorgeous princes and
princesses, Jo’s pleasure had a drop of bitterness in it. The fairy
queen’s yellow curls reminded her of Amy, and between the acts she
amused herself with wondering what her sister would do to make her
‘sorry for it’. She and Amy had had many lively skirmishes in the
course of their lives, for both had quick tempers and were apt to be
violent when fairly roused. Amy teased Jo, and Jo irritated Amy, and
semioccasional explosions occurred, of which both were much ashamed
afterward. Although the oldest, Jo had the least self-control, and had
hard times trying to curb the fiery spirit which was continually
getting her into trouble. Her anger never lasted long, and having
humbly confessed her fault, she sincerely repented and tried to do
better. Her sisters used to say that they rather liked to get Jo into a
fury because she was such an angel afterward. Poor Jo tried desperately
to be good, but her bosom enemy was always ready to flame up and defeat
her, and it took years of patient effort to subdue it.
When they got home, they found Amy reading in the parlor. She assumed
an injured air as they came in, never lifted her eyes from her book, or
asked a single question. Perhaps curiosity might have conquered
resentment, if Beth had not been there to inquire and receive a glowing
description of the play. On going up to put away her best hat, Jo’s
first look was toward the bureau, for in their last quarrel Amy had
soothed her feelings by turning Jo’s top drawer upside down on the
floor. Everything was in its place, however, and after a hasty glance
into her various closets, bags, and boxes, Jo decided that Amy had
forgiven and forgotten her wrongs.
There Jo was mistaken, for next day she made a discovery which produced
a tempest. Meg, Beth, and Amy were sitting together, late in the
afternoon, when Jo burst into the room, looking excited and demanding
breathlessly, “Has anyone taken my book?”
Meg and Beth said, “No.” at once, and looked surprised. Amy poked the
fire and said nothing. Jo saw her color rise and was down upon her in a
minute.
“Amy, you’ve got it!”
“No, I haven’t.”
“You know where it is, then!”
“No, I don’t.”
“That’s a fib!” cried Jo, taking her by the shoulders, and looking
fierce enough to frighten a much braver child than Amy.
“It isn’t. I haven’t got it, don’t know where it is now, and don’t
care.”
“You know something about it, and you’d better tell at once, or I’ll
make you.” And Jo gave her a slight shake.
“Scold as much as you like, you’ll never see your silly old book
again,” cried Amy, getting excited in her turn.
“Why not?”
“I burned it up.”
“What! My little book I was so fond of, and worked over, and meant to
finish before Father got home? Have you really burned it?” said Jo,
turning very pale, while her eyes kindled and her hands clutched Amy
nervously.
“Yes, I did! I told you I’d make you pay for being so cross yesterday,
and I have, so...”
Amy got no farther, for Jo’s hot temper mastered her, and she shook Amy
till her teeth chattered in her head, crying in a passion of grief and
anger...
“You wicked, wicked girl! I never can write it again, and I’ll never
forgive you as long as I live.”
Meg flew to rescue Amy, and Beth to pacify Jo, but Jo was quite beside
herself, and with a parting box on her sister’s ear, she rushed out of
the room up to the old sofa in the garret, and finished her fight
alone.
The storm cleared up below, for Mrs. March came home, and, having heard
the story, soon brought Amy to a sense of the wrong she had done her
sister. Jo’s book was the pride of her heart, and was regarded by her
family as a literary sprout of great promise. It was only half a dozen
little fairy tales, but Jo had worked over them patiently, putting her
whole heart into her work, hoping to make something good enough to
print. She had just copied them with great care, and had destroyed the
old manuscript, so that Amy’s bonfire had consumed the loving work of
several years. It seemed a small loss to others, but to Jo it was a
dreadful calamity, and she felt that it never could be made up to her.
Beth mourned as for a departed kitten, and Meg refused to defend her
pet. Mrs. March looked grave and grieved, and Amy felt that no one
would love her till she had asked pardon for the act which she now
regretted more than any of them.
When the tea bell rang, Jo appeared, looking so grim and unapproachable
that it took all Amy’s courage to say meekly...
“Please forgive me, Jo. I’m very, very sorry.”
“I never shall forgive you,” was Jo’s stern answer, and from that
moment she ignored Amy entirely.
No one spoke of the great trouble, not even Mrs. March, for all had
learned by experience that when Jo was in that mood words were wasted,
and the wisest course was to wait till some little accident, or her own
generous nature, softened Jo’s resentment and healed the breach. It was
not a happy evening, for though they sewed as usual, while their mother
read aloud from Bremer, Scott, or Edgeworth, something was wanting, and
the sweet home peace was disturbed. They felt this most when singing
time came, for Beth could only play, Jo stood dumb as a stone, and Amy
broke down, so Meg and Mother sang alone. But in spite of their efforts
to be as cheery as larks, the flutelike voices did not seem to chord as
well as usual, and all felt out of tune.
As Jo received her good-night kiss, Mrs. March whispered gently, “My
dear, don’t let the sun go down upon your anger. Forgive each other,
help each other, and begin again tomorrow.”
Jo wanted to lay her head down on that motherly bosom, and cry her
grief and anger all away, but tears were an unmanly weakness, and she
felt so deeply injured that she really couldn’t quite forgive yet. So
she winked hard, shook her head, and said gruffly because Amy was
listening, “It was an abominable thing, and she doesn’t deserve to be
forgiven.”
With that she marched off to bed, and there was no merry or
confidential gossip that night.
Amy was much offended that her overtures of peace had been repulsed,
and began to wish she had not humbled herself, to feel more injured
than ever, and to plume herself on her superior virtue in a way which
was particularly exasperating. Jo still looked like a thunder cloud,
and nothing went well all day. It was bitter cold in the morning, she
dropped her precious turnover in the gutter, Aunt March had an attack
of the fidgets, Meg was sensitive, Beth would look grieved and wistful
when she got home, and Amy kept making remarks about people who were
always talking about being good and yet wouldn’t even try when other
people set them a virtuous example.
“Everybody is so hateful, I’ll ask Laurie to go skating. He is always
kind and jolly, and will put me to rights, I know,” said Jo to herself,
and off she went.
Amy heard the clash of skates, and looked out with an impatient
exclamation.
“There! She promised I should go next time, for this is the last ice we
shall have. But it’s no use to ask such a crosspatch to take me.”
“Don’t say that. You were very naughty, and it is hard to forgive the
loss of her precious little book, but I think she might do it now, and
I guess she will, if you try her at the right minute,” said Meg. “Go
after them. Don’t say anything till Jo has got good-natured with
Laurie, than take a quiet minute and just kiss her, or do some kind
thing, and I’m sure she’ll be friends again with all her heart.”
“I’ll try,” said Amy, for the advice suited her, and after a flurry to
get ready, she ran after the friends, who were just disappearing over
the hill.
It was not far to the river, but both were ready before Amy reached
them. Jo saw her coming, and turned her back. Laurie did not see, for
he was carefully skating along the shore, sounding the ice, for a warm
spell had preceded the cold snap.
“I’ll go on to the first bend, and see if it’s all right before we
begin to race,” Amy heard him say, as he shot away, looking like a
young Russian in his fur-trimmed coat and cap.
Jo heard Amy panting after her run, stamping her feet and blowing on
her fingers as she tried to put her skates on, but Jo never turned and
went slowly zigzagging down the river, taking a bitter, unhappy sort of
satisfaction in her sister’s troubles. She had cherished her anger till
it grew strong and took possession of her, as evil thoughts and
feelings always do unless cast out at once. As Laurie turned the bend,
he shouted back...
“Keep near the shore. It isn’t safe in the middle.” Jo heard, but Amy
was struggling to her feet and did not catch a word. Jo glanced over
her shoulder, and the little demon she was harboring said in her ear...
“No matter whether she heard or not, let her take care of herself.”
Laurie had vanished round the bend, Jo was just at the turn, and Amy,
far behind, striking out toward the smoother ice in the middle of the
river. For a minute Jo stood still with a strange feeling in her heart,
then she resolved to go on, but something held and turned her round,
just in time to see Amy throw up her hands and go down, with a sudden
crash of rotten ice, the splash of water, and a cry that made Jo’s
heart stand still with fear. She tried to call Laurie, but her voice
was gone. She tried to rush forward, but her feet seemed to have no
strength in them, and for a second, she could only stand motionless,
staring with a terror-stricken face at the little blue hood above the
black water. Something rushed swiftly by her, and Laurie’s voice cried
out...
“Bring a rail. Quick, quick!”
How she did it, she never knew, but for the next few minutes she worked
as if possessed, blindly obeying Laurie, who was quite self-possessed,
and lying flat, held Amy up by his arm and hockey stick till Jo dragged
a rail from the fence, and together they got the child out, more
frightened than hurt.
“Now then, we must walk her home as fast as we can. Pile our things on
her, while I get off these confounded skates,” cried Laurie, wrapping
his coat round Amy, and tugging away at the straps which never seemed
so intricate before.
Shivering, dripping, and crying, they got Amy home, and after an
exciting time of it, she fell asleep, rolled in blankets before a hot
fire. During the bustle Jo had scarcely spoken but flown about, looking
pale and wild, with her things half off, her dress torn, and her hands
cut and bruised by ice and rails and refractory buckles. When Amy was
comfortably asleep, the house quiet, and Mrs. March sitting by the bed,
she called Jo to her and began to bind up the hurt hands.
“Are you sure she is safe?” whispered Jo, looking remorsefully at the
golden head, which might have been swept away from her sight forever
under the treacherous ice.
“Quite safe, dear. She is not hurt, and won’t even take cold, I think,
you were so sensible in covering and getting her home quickly,” replied
her mother cheerfully.
“Laurie did it all. I only let her go. Mother, if she should die, it
would be my fault.” And Jo dropped down beside the bed in a passion of
penitent tears, telling all that had happened, bitterly condemning her
hardness of heart, and sobbing out her gratitude for being spared the
heavy punishment which might have come upon her.
“It’s my dreadful temper! I try to cure it, I think I have, and then it
breaks out worse than ever. Oh, Mother, what shall I do? What shall I
do?” cried poor Jo, in despair.
“Watch and pray, dear, never get tired of trying, and never think it is
impossible to conquer your fault,” said Mrs. March, drawing the blowzy
head to her shoulder and kissing the wet cheek so tenderly that Jo
cried even harder.
“You don’t know, you can’t guess how bad it is! It seems as if I could
do anything when I’m in a passion. I get so savage, I could hurt anyone
and enjoy it. I’m afraid I shall do something dreadful some day, and
spoil my life, and make everybody hate me. Oh, Mother, help me, do help
me!”
Louisa May Alcott — text from Project Gutenberg (eBook #514)
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