Part 23

“Yes,” said Mr Cunningham. “He wrote Latin poetry.” “Is that so?” said Mr Fogarty. Mr M’Coy tasted his whisky contentedly and shook his head with a double intention, saying: “That’s no joke, I can tell you.” “We didn’t learn that, Tom,” said Mr Power, following Mr M’Coy’s example, “when we went to the penny-a-week school.” “There was many a good man went to the penny-a-week school with a sod of turf under his oxter,” said Mr Kernan sententiously. “The old system was the best: plain honest education. None of your modern trumpery....” “Quite right,” said Mr Power. “No superfluities,” said Mr Fogarty. He enunciated the word and then drank gravely. “I remember reading,” said Mr Cunningham, “that one of Pope Leo’s poems was on the invention of the photograph—in Latin, of course.” “On the photograph!” exclaimed Mr Kernan. “Yes,” said Mr Cunningham. He also drank from his glass. “Well, you know,” said Mr M’Coy, “isn’t the photograph wonderful when you come to think of it?” “O, of course,” said Mr Power, “great minds can see things.” “As the poet says: _Great minds are very near to madness_,” said Mr Fogarty. Mr Kernan seemed to be troubled in mind. He made an effort to recall the Protestant theology on some thorny points and in the end addressed Mr Cunningham. “Tell me, Martin,” he said. “Weren’t some of the popes—of course, not our present man, or his predecessor, but some of the old popes—not exactly ... you know ... up to the knocker?” There was a silence. Mr Cunningham said: “O, of course, there were some bad lots.... But the astonishing thing is this. Not one of them, not the biggest drunkard, not the most ... out-and-out ruffian, not one of them ever preached _ex cathedra_ a word of false doctrine. Now isn’t that an astonishing thing?” “That is,” said Mr Kernan. “Yes, because when the Pope speaks _ex cathedra_,” Mr Fogarty explained, “he is infallible.” “Yes,” said Mr Cunningham. “O, I know about the infallibility of the Pope. I remember I was younger then.... Or was it that——?” Mr Fogarty interrupted. He took up the bottle and helped the others to a little more. Mr M’Coy, seeing that there was not enough to go round, pleaded that he had not finished his first measure. The others accepted under protest. The light music of whisky falling into glasses made an agreeable interlude. “What’s that you were saying, Tom?” asked Mr M’Coy. “Papal infallibility,” said Mr Cunningham, “that was the greatest scene in the whole history of the Church.” “How was that, Martin?” asked Mr Power. Mr Cunningham held up two thick fingers. “In the sacred college, you know, of cardinals and archbishops and bishops there were two men who held out against it while the others were all for it. The whole conclave except these two was unanimous. No! They wouldn’t have it!” “Ha!” said Mr M’Coy. “And they were a German cardinal by the name of Dolling ... or Dowling ... or——” “Dowling was no German, and that’s a sure five,” said Mr Power, laughing. “Well, this great German cardinal, whatever his name was, was one; and the other was John MacHale.” “What?” cried Mr Kernan. “Is it John of Tuam?” “Are you sure of that now?” asked Mr Fogarty dubiously. “I thought it was some Italian or American.” “John of Tuam,” repeated Mr Cunningham, “was the man.” He drank and the other gentlemen followed his lead. Then he resumed: “There they were at it, all the cardinals and bishops and archbishops from all the ends of the earth and these two fighting dog and devil until at last the Pope himself stood up and declared infallibility a dogma of the Church _ex cathedra_. On the very moment John MacHale, who had been arguing and arguing against it, stood up and shouted out with the voice of a lion: ‘_Credo!_’” “_I believe!_” said Mr Fogarty. “_Credo!_” said Mr Cunningham. “That showed the faith he had. He submitted the moment the Pope spoke.” “And what about Dowling?” asked Mr M’Coy. “The German cardinal wouldn’t submit. He left the church.” Mr Cunningham’s words had built up the vast image of the church in the minds of his hearers. His deep raucous voice had thrilled them as it uttered the word of belief and submission. When Mrs Kernan came into the room drying her hands she came into a solemn company. She did not disturb the silence, but leaned over the rail at the foot of the bed. “I once saw John MacHale,” said Mr Kernan, “and I’ll never forget it as long as I live.” He turned towards his wife to be confirmed. “I often told you that?” Mrs Kernan nodded. “It was at the unveiling of Sir John Gray’s statue. Edmund Dwyer Gray was speaking, blathering away, and here was this old fellow, crabbed-looking old chap, looking at him from under his bushy eyebrows.” Mr Kernan knitted his brows and, lowering his head like an angry bull, glared at his wife. “God!” he exclaimed, resuming his natural face, “I never saw such an eye in a man’s head. It was as much as to say: _I have you properly taped, my lad_. He had an eye like a hawk.” “None of the Grays was any good,” said Mr Power. There was a pause again. Mr Power turned to Mrs Kernan and said with abrupt joviality: “Well, Mrs Kernan, we’re going to make your man here a good holy pious and God-fearing Roman Catholic.” He swept his arm round the company inclusively. “We’re all going to make a retreat together and confess our sins—and God knows we want it badly.” “I don’t mind,” said Mr Kernan, smiling a little nervously. Mrs Kernan thought it would be wiser to conceal her satisfaction. So she said: “I pity the poor priest that has to listen to your tale.” Mr Kernan’s expression changed. “If he doesn’t like it,” he said bluntly, “he can ... do the other thing. I’ll just tell him my little tale of woe. I’m not such a bad fellow——” Mr Cunningham intervened promptly. “We’ll all renounce the devil,” he said, “together, not forgetting his works and pomps.” “Get behind me, Satan!” said Mr Fogarty, laughing and looking at the others. Mr Power said nothing. He felt completely out-generalled. But a pleased expression flickered across his face. “All we have to do,” said Mr Cunningham, “is to stand up with lighted candles in our hands and renew our baptismal vows.” “O, don’t forget the candle, Tom,” said Mr M’Coy, “whatever you do.” “What?” said Mr Kernan. “Must I have a candle?” “O yes,” said Mr Cunningham. “No, damn it all,” said Mr Kernan sensibly, “I draw the line there. I’ll do the job right enough. I’ll do the retreat business and confession, and ... all that business. But ... no candles! No, damn it all, I bar the candles!” He shook his head with farcical gravity. “Listen to that!” said his wife. “I bar the candles,” said Mr Kernan, conscious of having created an effect on his audience and continuing to shake his head to and fro. “I bar the magic-lantern business.” Everyone laughed heartily. “There’s a nice Catholic for you!” said his wife. “No candles!” repeated Mr Kernan obdurately. “That’s off!” The transept of the Jesuit Church in Gardiner Street was almost full; and still at every moment gentlemen entered from the side door and, directed by the lay-brother, walked on tiptoe along the aisles until they found seating accommodation. The gentlemen were all well dressed and orderly. The light of the lamps of the church fell upon an assembly of black clothes and white collars, relieved here and there by tweeds, on dark mottled pillars of green marble and on lugubrious canvases. The gentlemen sat in the benches, having hitched their trousers slightly above their knees and laid their hats in security. They sat well back and gazed formally at the distant speck of red light which was suspended before the high altar. In one of the benches near the pulpit sat Mr Cunningham and Mr Kernan. In the bench behind sat Mr M’Coy alone: and in the bench behind him sat Mr Power and Mr Fogarty. Mr M’Coy had tried unsuccessfully to find a place in the bench with the others and, when the party had settled down in the form of a quincunx, he had tried unsuccessfully to make comic remarks. As these had not been well received he had desisted. Even he was sensible of the decorous atmosphere and even he began to respond to the religious stimulus. In a whisper Mr Cunningham drew Mr Kernan’s attention to Mr Harford, the moneylender, who sat some distance off, and to Mr Fanning, the registration agent and mayor maker of the city, who was sitting immediately under the pulpit beside one of the newly elected councillors of the ward. To the right sat old Michael Grimes, the owner of three pawnbroker’s shops, and Dan Hogan’s nephew, who was up for the job in the Town Clerk’s office. Farther in front sat Mr Hendrick, the chief reporter of _The Freeman’s Journal_, and poor O’Carroll, an old friend of Mr Kernan’s, who had been at one time a considerable commercial figure. Gradually, as he recognised familiar faces, Mr Kernan began to feel more at home. His hat, which had been rehabilitated by his wife, rested upon his knees. Once or twice he pulled down his cuffs with one hand while he held the brim of his hat lightly, but firmly, with the other hand. A powerful-looking figure, the upper part of which was draped with a white surplice, was observed to be struggling up into the pulpit. Simultaneously the congregation unsettled, produced handkerchiefs and knelt upon them with care. Mr Kernan followed the general example. The priest’s figure now stood upright in the pulpit, two-thirds of its bulk, crowned by a massive red face, appearing above the balustrade. Father Purdon knelt down, turned towards the red speck of light and, covering his face with his hands, prayed. After an interval, he uncovered his face and rose. The congregation rose also and settled again on its benches. Mr Kernan restored his hat to its original position on his knee and presented an attentive face to the preacher. The preacher turned back each wide sleeve of his surplice with an elaborate large gesture and slowly surveyed the array of faces. Then he said: _“For the children of this world are wiser in their generation than the children of light. Wherefore make unto yourselves friends out of the mammon of iniquity so that when you die they may receive you into everlasting dwellings.”_ Father Purdon developed the text with resonant assurance. It was one of the most difficult texts in all the Scriptures, he said, to interpret properly. It was a text which might seem to the casual observer at variance with the lofty morality elsewhere preached by Jesus Christ. But, he told his hearers, the text had seemed to him specially adapted for the guidance of those whose lot it was to lead the life of the world and who yet wished to lead that life not in the manner of worldlings. It was a text for business men and professional men. Jesus Christ, with His divine understanding of every cranny of our human nature, understood that all men were not called to the religious life, that by far the vast majority were forced to live in the world and, to a certain extent, for the world: and in this sentence He designed to give them a word of counsel, setting before them as exemplars in the religious life those very worshippers of Mammon who were of all men the least solicitous in matters religious. He told his hearers that he was there that evening for no terrifying, no extravagant purpose; but as a man of the world speaking to his fellow-men. He came to speak to business men and he would speak to them in a businesslike way. If he might use the metaphor, he said, he was their spiritual accountant; and he wished each and every one of his hearers to open his books, the books of his spiritual life, and see if they tallied accurately with conscience. Jesus Christ was not a hard taskmaster. He understood our little failings, understood the weakness of our poor fallen nature, understood the temptations of this life. We might have had, we all had from time to time, our temptations: we might have, we all had, our failings. But one thing only, he said, he would ask of his hearers. And that was: to be straight and manly with God. If their accounts tallied in every point to say: